LIGHTHOUSE

5 Scouts:  One standing with a flashlight rotating out to the audience.   Three Scouts kneel in front of him to form a "rock wall" to support the lighthouse.  The 5th scout is the narrator.

Narrator: "Many many years ago, the fishermen of a small coastal town gathered up enough money to build a lighthouse, so that all the ships could safely return home at night.  They built a nice, big, strong and sturdy lighthouse."

Narrator: "About 20 years later, one of the walls supporting the lighthouse fell."  (One of the 3 scouts in front fall, but stays there.) "Many people  were upset about this, so the fishermen of the town gathered enough money to put up a support for the wall."   (The narrator goes out to the camp staff section and selects one female counselor.)  (The counselor then kneels where the crushed wall now lays.)

Narrator:  "The support kept the lighthouse standing, and is doing its job to thhis day."  "About another 10 years later, a second wall to the lighthouse fell.  Th epopele of the town were upset at this and the fishermen once again raised enough money to build a support for the second wall."  (The narrator goes out and selects anothe female camp counselor to serve as a suport.)

Narrator: "This support was good and strong and helped keep the lighouse standing to this day.  But, about 5 years later, the third wall fell.  The town's people were very upset at this and once again the fishermen raised enough money to build a third support for the lighouse." (Narrator selectes a third female counselor to serve as the third support.)

Narrator: "there!  With the help of the fishermen and the supports, the great lighouse still stands today, lighting the way for the ships at night. Shhh, listen... you can still hear the sound of the water slapping against the supports."  (The 3 scouts who were fallen walls spank the three counselors to make the sound of water slapping the rocks.)

HILARIOUS!!!

"Prayer to the Gods"

Narrator: "Good evening Scouts!  So what did you think of the weather to today?"  [choose from below:]

 -"It wasn't too great was it?  That's because the weather gods of camp __________ were not pleased with us.  SO, to make them happy, so that we'll have good weather tomorrow, we should offer them a little prayer.  TO help us in the prayer, can we have a few staff members:  _________  ___________  and ____________."

 -"What a beautiful day we had today!! Right?  We should praise the gods of Camp _____________ for the good weather.  If we don't. we may not be so lucky tomorrow. To lead the prayer, as symbols of the whole camp, can we please have the following staff members: ___________ _____________ and _____________."

Narrator: "Now, listen carefully, our staff members. You must say these exactly as I tell you, and exactly HOW I tell you, or the gods won't be happy.   You must pray to:

"Oh-wah - God of the water."
"Tah-jer - God of the sky."
"Kai-yam - God of the land."

  (repeat the three names slowly and clearly. Have them repeat them until correct."

Narrator: "Now, you have to chant the three names, IN ORDER. First you start slowly, but each time you say it, you go faster, and you blend the three names together.  Now let's try it.."

 It should sound like this:
   Oh-wah.....   tah-jer.... kai-yam....
   oh-wah...  tah-jer...  kai-yam...
   oh-wah..  tah-jer.. kai-yam..
   oh-wah, tah-jer, kai-yam

   OH WHAT A JERK I AM!!!

Make sure that do it correctly or it will not come out right.

The Coffee Table

This one was done at a District Cuboree, by the ADC Cubs and his Service Team. They pulled in Pack Scouters to help as 'furniture' and left the best piece of furniture to some justly deserved scouter  - which is where the punch-line becomes obvious.

Scene:  A new apartment which the owner is trying to sell. Initially the apartment is empty.

The first potential occupant is shown around, and the beautiful view, well laid out kitchen, etc. is stressed. This person leaves the scene muttering about looking for a furnished place.

The owner then solicits the help of Pack Scouters to act as pieces of furniture (Dining table, sofa, TV, etc - anything but a coffee table).

Once the pieces are in place a new client is shown around, andmore interest is expressed, however this person leaves muttering about the need for a FULLY furnished apartment.

Our creative owner then gets more help from Pack Scouters, perhaps as a throw-rug, hall lamp, reading lamp, etc. This can be dragged on for as long as necessary, depending on audience reaction, cold weather, etc. At some point the owner asked the 'justly deserving' scouter to help out. <Totally unsuspecting, I walked right into this one !> This scouter is asked to represent a coffee table - so he must be on his hands and knees.

A new client is then shown around, and, after the appropriate comments on the apartment layout, furnishings, etc., our client asks "What floor are we on?" at the response of "40th floor" our client looks out of the 'window' and staggers away, holding head, "I feel faint, I'm afraid of heights !" 

Our sincere owner then suggests that the client sits down and has a glass of water - <a large cup of water is handed to the 'owner' by a helper>. After taking a couple of sips, the client places the large cup of water on the coffee table, and then leaves.

The owner then makes some comment about it being too difficult to sell/rent the apartment, and decides to return all the furnishings. In a load voice he thanks the Scouters for helping with the skit and asks them to return to the campfire circle.

Unforunately, our 'justly deserving' scouter cannot move, as he has a large cup of water placed squarely on his back.

The cubs were very quick to spot how this skit was to end - thankfully it was warm evening and it didn't take long for me to dry out.

"A Gathering of Nuts"

DO NOT announce this skit by title! (it's the punch line...)

Call up your volunteers: 2 Curtains, Sun, Moon, Wolf, Large Rock, Babbling Brook, Trees, Rabbits, Squirrels, Deer, Orchestra (drums, horns, flutes, etc.), Breeze/Wind, plus whatever else you can think of / need to use in filling the stage... (very flexible skit!) To open, the Curtains stand side by side center stage, the Moon is standing up, the Sun is sitting down, and other parts are arranged to taste (Babbling Brook usually lays flat on the back next to a sitting Rock, etc.) Rehearse each part in their expected actions as they come to the stage: Brook repeats "Babble, babble", Trees sway their arms in the air, Breeze/Wind says "Whooosh!", Orchestra instruments go "Toot" "Thump" "Clang" or whistle as appropriate, and so forth... The rock can be a great deal of fun -- I like to have him/her recite a list of geology terms and mineral names, but it can be very effective if the rock just repeats "I am a rock: I am an island" <gryn>

approximate narration: As the Curtains part (Curtains walk away from each other), the Orchestra plays and we look upon a lovely woodland setting. Trees sway in the breeze, under the lovely Moon, while a Wolf howls in the background.  The Moon sets, the Sun rises, the rabbits, squirrels, and deer gambol and play, shaking their bushy tails. The babbling brook flows by the ancient rock.  (adjust according to parts active on "stage".)

[question to audience] And, although this little play has no title, have you ever seen such a gathering of nuts?

Fishing for Suckers

Centre stage is a lad fishing from a billy can or bucket, he keeps pulling the rod as though he has something on the line.  A passer by looks at him as he walks by and then walks on, after a few steps the passer by comes back to the
lad.

Passer by:     "What are you doing there then?"
Fisher:        "I`m fishing, what does it look as though I`m doing?"
Passer by:     "Fishing eh!, what are you fishing for."
Fisher:        "I`m fishing for suckers."
Passer by:     "Have you caught any?"
Fisher:        "Yes you`re the third today"

CAMP COFFEE SKETCH

You need a large dixie or billy in the centre of the stage and four scouts.   In England we have nesting sets of aluminium cooking pots with a steel wire handle.  They look like a small straight sided bucket or paint pot.  These are called Billys or Billycans.  We also have larger cast iron or steel cooking pots usually oval in shape.  Most of these are army surplus and are known as Dixies.

1st scout       (Walks to billy carrying his mug.  He dips his mug in and brings it up to his lips for a drink. )
                " THIS CAMP COFFEE IS GETTING WORSE! "

2nd scout       (Walks to billy carrying his mug.  He dips his mug in and brings it up to his lips for a drink. )
                " THIS CAMP TEA IS GETTING WORSE! "

3rd scout       (Walks to billy carrying his mug.  He dips his mug in and brings it up to his lips for a drink. )
                " THIS CAMP CHOCOLATE IS GETTING WORSE! "

4th scout       (Walks to billy, dips his hands in and takes out a pair of wet socks.  As he wrings them out he says. )
                 "I THOUGHT THAT WOULD GET THEM CLEAN!"

The Cowboy Story

Instructions:
Form a large circle with the boys and you assign them a character, there can be 1 or more of each character. As you are telling the story the boy run on the outside of the circle saying what their character says until they reach the spot they started out at. The boys repeat doing this every time until the story is done.

CHARACTERS
The Cowboy: 	Yippee
Old Paintbrush:  	Slap hands on knees to make a galloping sound
Old Chief Woodwillow:	KI YI
"Emma" the snake	Rattle Rattle
Sitting Bull:	Hee Haw
Timber wolf: 	Wolf Whistle
Sherriff:	Bang Bang
Deputy Sherriff: 	 He Went that-a-way

The Story:

Once upon a time there was a cowboy... who went off into the Mojave desert riding his horse Old Paintbrush...Far off in the distance he could hear the timber wolf....The Cowboy... made camp and went to sleep, first making sure his horse, Old Paintbrush.... was secure. 

Now, creeping along the desert, came Cheif Woodwillow... riding his mule, Sitting Bull... However he know nothing about the Sherriff....and his deputy.... In his pocket Chief Woodwillow...had a trained rattlesnake named Emma.... This rattle snake, Emma...was trained to creep up and bite the Cowboy....and his horse, Old Paintbrush....While Chief Woodwillow...crept up. the horse Old Paintbrush...was afraid, the timber wolf... howled, the cowboy...snored and Sitting Bull, the mule...was eating cactus.  In the meantime the Sherriff... and his deputy... were already to capture old Chief Woodwillow...Just as Emma... was about to bite the cowboy... and his horse old Paintbrush...the Sherriff...and his depty...sprang the trap. "Halt, you are my prisoner" shouted the sherriff...and his deputy...The cowboy...woke up and mounted his horse Old Paintbrush... This frighted the timberwolf...and also Emma... Away went Old Chief Woodwillow...on his faithful mule, Sitting Bull...  and away went, in pursuit, the Sherriff...his depty... the cowboy...and his horse Old Paintbrush...But Old Chief Woodwillow...led them into a blind canyon, so that was the last that anyone ever heard of the cowboy...his horse Old Paintbrush...Emma... the timber wolf... Sitting Bull... the sherriff... and his deputy...!

Dinner Special

Two customers enter a fancy seafood restaurant, study the menues, etc. Waiter arrives to take orders. One customer orders shrimp. The second says, " I'd like a lobster tail, Please."

Waiter says approprite things, goes away, returns with a storybook, sits down near customer two but faces audience, and begins to read; " Once upon a time, there was a little lobster......."

Good Soup!

A number of players are tasting and admiring a bowl of soup. Ad lib comments about how wonderful and delicious it is. Camp cook runs out waving floor mop and yelling, " Get out of my mop water".  

The Important Papers
 
ROYAL GUARD: (enters and announces) "His Majesty, the King!"

(King enters, followed by his court. He sits on his throne)

KING: (bellowing authoritatively) "Bring me my important papers."

A ROYAL SUBJECT: (humbly offering some documents) "Here, sire, here are your important papers.

KING: (slaps the documents away) "BAH! Bring me my important papers."

ANOTHER ROYAL SUBJECT: (humbly and scared offering documents)"Here, your majesty. Here are your papers".

KING: (in a rage) "Off with his head!  I want my important papers!"

(just then a knave walks by carrying a roll of toilet paper)

KING: "Ahh, my important papers!" (grabs roll and exits quickly).

The Radio Skit

This is the Radio Skit.  It requires 5 people to read the parts and one to tune the radio.  Each part should follow right on the heels of the previous part to get the effect of changing stations on the radio.

CUB SCOUT:  Good Evening, friends!  Tonight, I'm going to tell you about Cub Scouting.  Cub Scouting is a home-centered program for boys, their leaders, their families, and ...

POLITICIAN (passionately):  ...scoundrels in high places! I say to you, we must send to Congress men and women of integrity who will stand up to temptation and say...

SOAP OPERA (with feeling):  ...let me hold you in my arms, darling!  Yes my sweet, come close...closer still, let me put my arms around you, and then...

FIGHT (hard staccato):  ...a hard looping right to the stomach!  Wow! Whatta fight this is, folks!  Murphy swings a left to the jaw, a right to the head, a left, a right, another right and the Butcher goes down.  He drops straight back on his...

COMMERCIAL (loud and brassy):  ...large, economy size package. Yes, friends, ask your grocer today for this big, family-size box of Chlorophyll's Crummier Corn Flakes - the only corn flakes with the built-in crumb!  Once you've tasted Chlorophyll's, you'll say...

POLITICIAN:  ...How in the world can they do it?  How can these men, these elected servants for the people, put politics before principle in such a brazen and outrageous effort to advance their own selfish cause?  There is only one thing I know that will put a stop to their selfishness.  I mean none other than...

CUB SCOUT:  ...a group of overworked Den Leaders.  The answer to this, of course, is to select assistant leaders who can help out where needed.  When you ask someone to be a Den Leader, just walk right up and say...

SOAP OPERA:  ...Take your hands off me! Don't come near me! I can't stand you - do you hear?  I hate you...

CUB SCOUT:  ...in this way, of course a person is more likely to say "YES". And then there is only one thing to watch out for...

FIGHT:  ...another hard right to the stomach! Now the Butcher is moving in, and Murphy's looking bad - very bad.  He has a cut on the forehead and his left eye's swelling fast.  In fact, he reminds me of...

COMMERCIAL:  ...a soggy bowl of leftover corn flakes.  So accept no substitutes!  Always choose Chlorophyll's corn flakes for the crumminess you love to crunch.  Start your day with a big bowl full of Chlorophyll's, swimming in heavy cream and covered in strawberries, ... and a large heaping of ...

POLITICIAN: ...crooked politicians!  Yes, my friends, I repeat to you again and again that dishonesty in government, whether local, state or national, is a shame and a disgrace to our fair land. There is only one thing we can do about. Only one thing will save our proud and mighty nation...

CUB SCOUT:  ...four full dens in every Pack!  More boys in your Pack means more boys to enjoy the fun and benefits of Cub Scouting, as was as more families to share in the leadership.  With a full pack, a Cubmaster can look the Den Leaders in the face and say...

SOAP OPERA:  ...kiss me you fool!  All I ever expected from you was...

FIGHT:   ...a hard right to the stomach! And I can see what's coming now...

COMMERCIAL:  ...another bowl of soggy, leftover corn flakes.   So remember, always use Chlorophyll's...

POLITICIAN:  ...because their poison - yes, poison.  The best solution to political dishonesty is...

CUB SCOUT:  ...more and better Cub Scouting everywhere!